Thursday, March 06, 2008

the (un)importance of being nice...

don't know why but since i was little i've always had an extremely negative reaction to word "nice"... guess the equivalent korean word to that would be "chahk hah dah"... never liked that word either... probably it's from when my mom used to tell me "why couldn't you be nice like so-and-so's daughter...?"... well, that makes sense, i suppose...
for some reason i think i always thought (and knew) that people were expecting that quality a lot more from girls than boys... i mean if a girl is "nice" enough, it's good enough and makes up for other things she might be not... but if she's good at many other things but not "nice" enough, that comes off as bigger flaw than a boy... why is that...? why are girls expected to smile more than the boys...? why are girls supposed to be sweet and friendly to be liked...? and if you are not, they call you strong... but people usually don't say that to the boys, do they...?
i'm not saying being friendly and sweet and "nice" is bad but that hint of sexism really bothers me...
but then i also don't really like when people describe object "nice" either... it somehow sounds so in-between and lukewarm... what does it really mean when you way "it's nice"...?
ok, i'm just being a control freak right there...

well, if you know me in person and maybe you can describe me "nice" (yeah, right) but i think i usually balance it pretty well with being a bitch for the most of time... but do not worry, i'm not going to give you an evil eye for calling me "nice"...