Monday, September 10, 2007

babies and stuff... argh...

a friend of mine is having a baby very soon... she might be in labor right now, who knows... i think she's going to be a super cool mom... also over last few years many of my friends had a baby or two and they all seemed to be doing pretty alright...
but whenever i think about whole pregnancy thing, i get squeamish, seriously... i just cannot get over how it makes me feel physically when i think about giving a birth... it's not something i want to experience ever... like i never want to get married and stuff...
and usually when i say this to people, 99 percent of people says, usually female, "wait until you are 35, your hormone will go crazy..." well, they might be right but i still have a hard time believing that will happen to me ever... i've never wanted to have a baby since forever and don't even like the babies all that much... ok, they are super cute and all but having my own is a whole different story... so much responsibility... i guess i'm too selfish...
yes, many of my friends have told me it definitely was the best thing ever happened to them and i'm truly happy for them... but i don't think all females have that so-called maternal instinct... yes, it's supposedly all written in our genes but i don't want to feel guilty or pressured about not being maternal enough...
when i had this conversation with laurie on the tour about my girlfriends telling me to wait and see, her comment was "that's a great response. i waited."...
that was the best thing i've ever heard from a fellow female regarding the matter...
guess i'll just have to wait and see...
hmm...